What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. — Shakespear
The Hindu name Kamala Devi translates to Lady of the Lotus, and was given to me when I was living in an ashram and studying yoga at the International Sivananda Yoga Vedanta. It is said to have been chosen because of the numerology of my birth name and my vedic astrology.
After a day of fasting and a ritualized initiation, the orange clad swami who named me, Kamala Devi, cautioned that it was a powerful “tantric” name– and since they were not a tantric school, I should be careful how I use it. When I asked what she meant, she said:
“In tantra, Kamala Devi is she who worships the divine with her body.”
Intrigued, but intimidated, I kept my new moniker to myself, using it only in meditation with the accompanying mantra. After several years studying, traveling and teaching yoga, I began introducing myself as Kamala Devi in spiritual circles and eventually got the inner clarity to make an official name change.
I remember coming home for a family reunion and over a holiday dinner, I nervously announced that I was changing my name to Kamala Devi.
Without missing a beat, my father said: ‘Well, it’s about time!’
I asked him what he meant and he said, you seem to have outgrown your birth name, Monica, years ago. You are not even the same person. My 94 year old grandmother agreed (she loves me even though she thinks I’m a cult leader) and declared that from that point forward I was to be known as Kamala Devi.
So with my father’s permission, I let go of my paternal (patriarchal) last name. Years later, I took on my husbands last name, McClure but never used it, (because I didn’t want to be anyone’s property.) When my son started school, it felt so strange to hear little kids, like tele-marketers, calling me Mrs. McClure. Fortunately Name changes are easy in the state of California, you can simply write a declaration of your new name and if enough people call you it, for long enough, it becomes official.
My name is even more complicated when I travel. In India where tantra is pronounced, “Tuntrah” with a hindu accent, I was often called “Kumlah Davi.” While all my Mexican relatives (and I have a LOT of them) naturally pronounce it “Camilla.” For over fifteen years, I’ve heard many different nick names, from many different lovers, like Goddess Kamala, KD or Mistress Devi.
There are lots of examples in Hollywood of double first names: Sarah Jessica Parker, Jamie Lee Curtis, Jennifer Jason Leigh. Yet, Devi is used more like a title instead of a last name, like Lady Gaga or Amma Chi. In reality, most of my fans call me Kamala, because the focus of Showtime’s recent docu-series was not on tantra or spirituality, so I have developed a strong desire to hear my friends call me by my goddess title: Kamala Devi is a sweet reminder to practice seeing the divine in everything.
My girlfriend Roxanne admits it is a mouthful to say, “Kamala Devi” at the moment of orgasm. While my husband Michael teases that I am “no ordinary Kamala”, and that the full Kamala Devi is perfect because it’s “poly-syllabic.” Indeed it is hard enough in polyamory to keep all your lovers names straight, let alone remember a name change! Joking aside, I appreciate the effort everyone has put into using my full nam, and I respect those who simply refuse to call me anything but Kamala.
At the end of the day, you can call me whatever you want, and it doesn’t change who I am, (or how I smell) but at least now you know, my preference is Kamala Devi.
FYI: for those of you who keep asking me the meaning of Devi:
देवी Devī is the Sanskrit root-word for Goddess which has multiple uses and meanings:
1. Devi is used in India as a title following the personal name of a married woman. It is a mother goddess having various manifestations and roles.
2. She is wife or consort to Shiva. She represents energy and form while he represents consciousness. Devi is the female counterpart to the male aspect of the divine, (without whom, he remains impotent and void.)
3. Devis are female deities who guard and pray over every living thing — person, animal, or plant. Some believe each deva or devi acts like guardian angel inspiring and motivating whatever it is assigned to.
4. In Buddhism a devi is a type of non-human beings who is thought to be more powerful, longer-living, and, more realized than the average human being.
5. Devi is synonymous with Shakti, the female aspect of the divine, she is the supreme power in the universe, conceptualized as energy in the goddess worshipping traditions of Hinduism.
